I've always wanted a lomo camera.

So yeah since I figured I don't have the money I guess the next best option was photoshop. It's really fantastic what photoshop can do. Put a cow in one one end and with the correct button clicks you could probably get a ravishing beauty.

Below is one of the first attempts of mine at some form of interesting photography. Oh that's my maid anyway.




The original looks something like this.

Oh me and Regina went to the toy museum! A ticket's $7.50 if you flash your student card and they they give you a $5 dollar voucher which for 2 bucks more we discovered you can have a nice smoothie.

I think all people should have siblings no matter how irritating they may be. It's a lonely childhood without people to fight or qurrel with. It's quite a good thing I have quite a lot of cousins too. They make life a little more interesting. Haha actually while we all need toys, I think a good imagination and ability to improvise with other objects is more important to having a good time.

Tin toys, such as the above tin tops were probably waaay before our time. But they are all pretty cool though.



Such toys are really kind freaky I don't know why people would play with them. Doesn't it remind you of Chucky? Behind him would be his bride from hell.

Us three can be anything more than brothers from the same positronic womb.

And now I'm a believer.

Tin Casper and Wendy.

I used to love those crappy sweets! Haha. There was this one they said tasted like washing powder but I really liked it lols.

The cafe wall decor is really pretty here is a small part of it.

Somehow I think I took a lot more photos than the number stated in my camera rah I wonder if something happened to them. Cos I took a lot of photos of this bust but I can't seem to find them.

Oh well, let's end it off with the monochromatic closer.

Yeah I managed to salvage my cap a little, thank goodness.

I will strive to work even harder next semester!

I feel like rewarding myself with a big big slab of chocolate. That was for the nerves.

I think I am starting to be numbed by all these do a good deed and donate philosophy bandwagon which everyone is hoping onto right now.

Sure we like to feel like we are compassionate beings and all, but frankly I am a little tired of all that hype. People who seize the opportunity to advance their own cause, discreetly or not, on a conscious or sub-conscious level. Do we believe in what we do?

While I am sure that the recent happenings in Myanmar and China are devastating, it somehow seems to point out that catastrophes get their three minutes' worth on stage, and then make way for the next big thing to hit the fan. We then start this whole hoo-haa again.

One thing I am sure that the world will never run out of is the next big disaster, natural or man-made. In fact, as I am typing this right now, I am sure, somewhere in another part of the sphere, is another civil war or famine or another one of those sad tragedies. If we feel moved by such incidences, shouldn't we care also a little more about all the other ongoing events?

I believing in not doing whatever the majority is doing. There must be something which everyone missed out but just needs attention all the same.

While a single human life is possibly very insignificant, sometimes the decision of some significant being would then have a great impact on all of those insignificant ones. While life may be cheap, it seems that there are different values. It erodes slowly as the clock turns and the last minute becomes history. People, places, happenings, events all gradually lose to the ravages of time.

I empathise with all unfortunate people out there, but to say that I can begin to even understand how they feel would be presumptuous of me. I had never have any event in my life which can compare to what they have been through. I don't want to give sympathy, because it is demeaning if the other party doesn't demand it.

What I think I will do is to reflect on the fragility of life and then start caring a little more for the people around me. Try to do a little more good in the society that I live in.

And to give a little to the current hot cause and to causes not so publicised as well.

Finished the second season of Hana Yori Dango!!! Like finally after losing interest in it halfway probably somewhere last year. Somehow I couldn't get past the 7th episode, but recently I've finished the entire season from the beginning.

Yep it was cliche as usual. I mean, I've seen the same story in the Taiwan form (one only, two sucked) , in the manga form (nearly all volumes!!), in the anime form (twice!) and then now the Japanese live drama version, both seasons. Scary, somehow.

So that basically means I fell for all the stupid scenarios many times over. I quite ashamed to admit it, but I think it gets to me every time.

There is probably a thesis somewhere about how a successful franchise appeals to the fantasy and imagination of people, by perhaps portraying an idea of every one's most innate fantasies or something, but I'm not going to go into it.

The ending for the second season of the Jap drama is still the best, in my opinion, although the part about Umi is very forced somehow.

Oh well the rest of us in reality can keep on dreaming hahah.

Maybe that is more than enough.

I don't know if a thank you is in order.

Don't you think that that is the strange thing about our memories? How we choose to selectively remember and then randomly assigning an arbitrary idea of if the memory was 'good' or 'bad'.

So in a way we deceive ourselves by believing in only what we want to believe. Or is it that we are just comparing our different experiences over time? So that the value of each is viewed relative to one another.

Then it sort of averages out, I guess.

The tapestry was beautiful from afar, but closer inspection brings the frayed edges and shoddy work into clearer view. The swirling designs that suck in the eye now seem to be jarring. The faces leer and jeer. Look closer and anger, sadness, ennui and despair can be seen as well.

If you read the Monday column which asks the persona that they interview if there is anything that they would want to change in their lives if they had a chance, you would have realised that most actually replied that they would live life again the same way they did.

I find that very amusing and untrue. Well,not like those people would want others to hear about such an intimate part of their lives. Failure is a very personal thing in which you hope no one catches you in .

We can only agree to such a statement on hindsight. Impossible to do when you are stuck in the horrible actual situation. I guess we all have regrets, just that they vary in quantity and severity.

I do, actually. But I think there are really some things you would prefer to keep to yourself.

Oh well. The overview must probably seem alright anyway. Just as long as we don't have to relive it.

Before the main post proper, I just want to recount what an ass I've been today rah.

I had a painful fall today when getting off the bus stop at my house. Rah it was really very unglamorous. Worse of all I had a cake in my hand and of course it sort of got squished. I scraped my elbow quite badly and am now the proud owner of this gigantus blue-black of an ugly shape on my knee.

There were quite a few people gaping at the bus stop but I conveniently ignored all of them haha. And then tried to pretend that it didn't hurt that much really. It was only when I walked away that I realised that my arm was bleeding quite badly.

Anyway not the main point of the post. I realised that sometimes I come across as crude and cutting and totally lacking in social graces because I say like probably 10% of what I really wanted to convey. I guess this is partly because of my laziness and my conviction that people do not want to hear some grandmother philosophy.

Example :

Person A: I used to think that I was a big Mr Know-it all last time who thought that the opinion of others was crap.

Me: Yeah.

Person A:....

I think what I really wanted to say was this:

Yeah I think that you had somewhat a too high opinion of yourself last time. But I really think that you have become a better person since then so it's really ok. Anyway, I was pretty much a big bitch as well when it comes to opinions and things like that. I would like to think that both of us has moved past that stage of our lives as it is just a part of the process we call growing up. The fact that we still talk shows that I was really pretty much ok with it now and with you as a person.

But yeah that would probably be too mushy and sentimental.

So yes I don't get to say half the things I want to say so I guess the summary of it sounds pretty crude. This probably happened in more instances than I can count.

It's not my fault. Really.

Somehow I feel that the education system in Singapore doesn't allow for the idea or the process of failing, looking at the way we sometimes celebrate mediocrity and how even if we don't hit the target we try to make it look like we have. Either that, or it doesn't matter at all. So when we leave we realise that what a surreal feeling it all is.

Rah and I do think I handle like mortal embarrassment really badly.

I was reading in this book about how this guy can only do what he hates (or is scared of) by concentrating on other things and telling himself that it's not happening.

I find that I have the same coping mechanism. Haha escapists who try to get the job done in the end. Yeah maybe if I treat everything as unreal it will all seem easier. Then it all becomes a distant memory very fast.

And yes it is hard to admit that you are a failure sometimes. I guess as the rules say just as long as you learn it's ok. Hmmm so yea I guess it's ok.

Yeah I know. Convincing self-talk.

Human forgetfulness is both such a bane and a boon.

Gah, gah, gah.

Yeah the bloody exams are finally over and now I have like 3 months ahead till the next horrible semester hahaha.

Must fully make use of the bloody holidays before sliding down into the cesspool that is know as formal education. Oh well.

Feeling lazy and in an un-bloggerish mood at the moment.

I am slacking and slacking and slacking and not studying as hard as I ought to muhahah.

And I realyy need to ace both my SS module and the PR one. Rah. And these are the 2 exams that takes a shitload of memory work. Rah I am so horrible to blog and to netsuf at like this hour of the day hahah.

Alright but will get back to work at 10 sharp!

It's quite amusing to read what others write and to find them adressing some questions of exisitanal angst which you did quite a long while ago. When people get over those issues they move on with life. Hahah but yes I think those were so long ago I didn't quite remember.

Oh yes I shall only buy online stuff at reputable places and think long and hard before I make any purchase yeah. No more stupid spreeing! And no more buying just because I think I can fit into those clothes! Rah I shall only buy stuff WITH SIZES because I am short and do not have a cloths rack kind of body for all the generic stuff out there.

Ok enough of such derailments. Back on to study!

Yeah celebrating the arrival of the exulted May 7th.